Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Every Day I'm Shufflin'

Yes, I do realize it's been an entire month since I last posted.

Life is just THAT crazy right now.

The teenage body I once had is now encroaching 30, and it just can't function after about 9pm.

Isn't that sad?

Makes me feel OLD.

As if the 3 new gray hairs I found recently weren't enough...

I digress.

I'm realizing that following my dream is going to be a battle, one I'm not sure I'm equipped to fight. All I know is that I have to keep trying...keep setting goals...keep picking myself up off the ground after a devastating tumble to try again.

Oddly enough, the physical part of this struggle isn't overtaking me...it's the mental game. It's the "letting go of what everyone thinks of me" and just doing what I know I can do...and doing it with every bit of confidence I'm convinced I don't have.

It's looking fear in the face and screaming so loudly its eyelids stick to its menacing forehead.

I know I can do this.

I have one life to live, and this is its dream.

And I just cannot give up this time.